My memories of you with my friends are tinted red. Wait- green? No, red. 

I think of sitting next to my friend on her bed when your name came up on her caller ID- “We’re just friends!”

I think of my mom and aunt in their painting clothes, windows open wide for the world to hear me when I came barging in, crying about how you turned to MY best friend after a fight. I think about all the times the three of us hung out and how it was in my face the whole time. I think of things you gave to her instead of me.

I think of you pursuing another friend and her being uninterested, to which I chuckle. 

 

My memories of you outside are green.

I think of you in high school, running through the grass. I think you’re running away from someone with something tucked under your arm, your tongue is definitely sticking out, and a boyish joy radiates from you.

I think of you coaching our son’s baseball team every summer, the outfield shaggy and alive with evening bugs. I think of how much fun everyone had when you miraculously coached a three man team to victory.

I think of you in the garden, happily completing Hunny-do’s and up to your elbows in dirt, sweat, and soil.

 

My memories of you from the trenches of our first newborn days are blue.

I think of the nights from the apartment mostly, when I spent most of my time alone.

I think of our recovery room, when the nurses shamed us for playing card games well into the night with your siblings.

I think of how young we were and the difference that time would’ve made.

 

My memories of the you that I love the most are pink.

I think of you with flowers after work, with full cups of water at bedtime, and with handwritten cards throughout the years.

I think of the morning that I was waiting in the car for a friend when you showed up with flowers that you were planning on leaving for me to find. 

I think of you with open arms, pink cheeks, soft lips, and T-shirts that are always somehow softer on you.

I think of holding your hand while I teeter on heels through dark streets, body buzzing from alcohol and anticipation.

 

After 15 years, color theory stands as true as ever. The green cancels out the red. The blue and pink mix together to make cotton candy sunsets, the same ones we watch from our porch. Our memories are woven into the rainbow tinted tapestry that shaped us.